我的故事 ~ 22. 开辟属于自己的天地才是真生活

• by: Fan Hong & Liang Fen (Eds.)

“每位出国者都怀揣各自的梦想，但有一点是相同的，希望有更美好的明天。”

在珀斯已经生活了三十多年，但每当想起在国内的生活仍然是历历在目。80年代改革开放以后，很多人就是拼了命地往国外跑，去寻求自己的梦想，觉得只有在国外才能实现个人目标，创建属于自己的美好生活。其实我并不是很积极想出国的那种人。其中有两个原因，一个是我妈坚决反对我出国，她是比较保守、传统的人，她不希望女儿离她太远；还有一个原因就是我本身是学中医的，我不知道我出国干什么。我的先生是学理工科的，是大学老师。我和他谈恋爱的时候，正赶上出国热。可是母亲不同意，因为她认为一旦两个人分开，这其中的变数就不好说。原因就是她有一个朋友的女婿去了美国，头两年小夫妻俩关系很好，虽然一个月才50多块钱工资，打一次电话一分钟就得十几块钱人民币，他经常给妻子打电话，到了后来联系越来越少，再后来连人影都找不到了。她女儿一个人在国内带孩子，想离婚都找不到人。最后只得上法庭登记，说这个人失踪了，才办了离婚。这件事情对我父母刺激很大，所以母亲坚决要求，如果是他一定要出国，那我们就不要结婚，等他回来我们再结婚。我们就打消了出国的念头。后来我们结了婚。我自己也没有一点出国的愿望了。

中国改革开放以后，人们开始重视学历了，他在大学里干的也不错，当上了系副主任，属于年轻人里提拔比较早的人。他是硕士研究生毕业，本校没有同等专业，所以他在职读博士是不可能的。他年轻想往事业上更进一步，没有一个博士学位的话，是不可能进高级职称的，所以他还是想读一个博士。就在这个时候。他得到了一个公派访问学者的机会， 87年他来到澳大利亚墨尔本大学做了一年半的访问学者，当时写信回来和我商量，说他想争取奖学金，在外头读博士。我想读博士大概得四年时间，他已经在外头待了一年半了，再继续待四年，就是四年不回家，而且那个时候的政策也不允许我出来探亲，那我就觉得有点太难了，这四年我熬不过来。于是他就回来了。

回国以后我们就有了我们的女儿。就像其他中国人一样过着平平淡淡的日子。后来到了我女儿两、三岁的时候，他们学校又有一个公派出来读博士的名额，学校把这个名额给了他，因为当时他是系里的副主任，他的英语成绩也已达到出国的线了。当时报名表要的很急，所以他没有和我商量就报了名。但是当时我考虑到我女儿太小，才两三岁，我又在医院里工作，还要上夜班，再加上我身体也不太好，就我一个人带孩子太辛苦了。鉴于这个缘因，他自己又决定放弃这次出国学习的机会了。又过了一年多，又有一个出国读博的名额，系里的领导问他想不想去。这次我已经跟他说不能放弃了，很多年轻人都已经读了博士，如果要是没有一个博士学位的话，将来他的学历会拖后腿。同时这次的是有奖学金可以让我陪读，我可以跟他一起去。所以他才下决心了，我们当时都很年轻，就是一心地想学完以后回国想好好地发展。当时他拿的奖学金是澳大利亚援助第三世界国家，是有条款的，就是说学成以后不能留在澳大利亚一定要回国的。我的丈夫出国六年之后，1993年。我带着四岁的女儿到了澳大利亚。 Read more

My Story ~ 23. For All Walks Of Life, There Must Be A Master

“The Royal Australian Army has a motto: if the mind is strong, you can conquer everything.”

I followed my mother’s wish and came to Australia for further study in 1998. I was 15 years old then and now I am 31 … amazing!

I knew nothing and was a hot-headed young man when I came from the northeast part of China to Australia. After learning English for half a year, I began my high school study.

There were not many Chinese people when I first came here. The few who were here were from the generation who were born before 1980 and students who came here in 1989. The social environment was just OK compared with now, probably because the MP Pauline Hanson had just resigned and the One Nation Party still had the upper hand. Though young at that time, I was quite interested in politics so I knew a little about it.

Australian people are basically simple and honest and most importantly, you have to achieve something to win their recognition and become accepted. After all, Australia is an immigration society. I also worked part-time when I was studying. Well, people always say that you can’t say you have worked unless you have worked in a restaurant, so I went to serve dishes and wash plates. I have also worked in the kitchen and at the reception desk, carried furniture for a moving company and worked in a Coles Supermarket as well. I found these jobs were all very easy without too much thinking required. When I first entered college, I majored in law and commerce; I transferred to social sciences in the second year. In social sciences, there are two specific majors – politics and philosophy. I was poor in English so I chose these two majors which require demanding English, I wanted to push myself. Then I was so lucky because I found a law firm, having access to the career of a lawyer. I also worked as an office clerk during my college years.

Then in a late evening in Dec. 2003, an idea took a deep root in my mind:“I want to join the army!” That evening, stars in the southern hemisphere seemed especially bright.

With the excitement of the previous night, I called my mom back in China: “Mom, I’m going to join the army. What do you think?” She was surprised and rather reluctant: “Join the army? In Australia?” I replied with affirmation: “Yes, join the army in Australia!” She hesitated for a moment and said: “Why do you want to join the army? Aren’t you studying now and you want to join the army in a foreign land?” I explained to her: “Since I have moved to Australia, I feel as though I should contribute to this society and don’t want to only do business, tax and dealing.” She seemed to understand me and said: “So you want to contribute in this special way?” I was excited: “Yes, yes!” Mom was touched by my words and agreed with me: “All right! Good boy, do as you like and I’ll support you!” My eyes were shining with light at that moment as if the stars in the night reflected my enthusiasm. Read more

我的故事 ~ 23. 三百六十行，行行出状元

• by: Fan Hong & Liang Fen (Eds.)

“在澳大利亚皇家部队里有这么一句话:‘只要意志坚定，一切都不在话下’。”

1998年，听从母亲的选择，我只身一人来到澳洲留学，这一待，便是16年。那一年，我只有15岁。

从老家东北来到澳洲，啥也不懂，愣头青一个，硬是学习了半年语言，接着上了高中。刚到澳洲的时候，华人还不是很多。感觉是五六十年代，七八十年代老一批的华人，和89年大陆来的那一届的留学生。整体社会环境呢，跟现在相比，只能说是一般。因为可能那个时候联邦议员帕林瀚森刚刚下台，一族党的势力还很大。由于我一直对政治比较感兴趣，虽然那时候还小，但也还懂一些。

澳洲人还是比较淳朴的，最重要的一点是，你得做出成绩，人家就会认同你，把你当作他们其中的一员。毕竟澳洲是一个移民社会嘛。那时候，除了上学，还打过工。人家不都说嘛，要是没在餐馆打过工就不算打工，我也在餐馆里收过盘子，刷过盘子。在其中的一个店里做过后厨，前台服务；在一个搬家公司搬过家具；后来呢就在一个Coles超市打工。我觉得这些都很容易，不费脑子。就读大学期间，一开始读的是法律和商业，第二年把商业转成了文学，文学的两个专业是政治和哲学。当时由于英文不好，所以特意选择一些相应的对英文要求高的课程，逼着自己把英文提高一些。接着，很幸运的找到了一家律师事务所，开始接触律师行业，大学期间在里面做文员的工作。

2003年12月某深夜，一个想法深深地在我脑海里扎下了根：“我要参军！”那一夜，南半球的星空格外的璀璨。第二天清晨，依旧带着前一夜的兴奋，我给远在中国的母亲打了个越洋电话。“妈，我打算参军，您觉得怎么样？”“参军？在澳大利亚？”母亲惊奇且带着疑惑地问道。“对！就是在澳洲参军！”我坚定地答道。母亲迟疑了一下：“为什么要当兵，你还在读书，而且还是在异国他乡。”“我既然在澳洲移民了，就要为这个社会做贡献，我不想单纯地以做生意、交税、创造就业这样的方式来做贡献。”我解释道。母亲似乎有所理解了：“所以你就想以参军这样比较特殊的贡献方式么？”我兴奋地答道：“对！对！”“好！儿子你尽管大胆地去做，妈妈支持你！” 似乎被我的兴奋所感染，母亲豪迈地肯定了我的想法。这一刻，我的眼睛里闪烁着坚定的光芒，就像是前一夜的星空印在了我的眼里。

人一旦想法坚定了，接下来就是按部就班地着手准备工作了。通过网络、朋友等一些途径做了一番研究之后，我就联系了军队。在跟军队接触的过程之中，对方了解到我的专业是法律，就建议我报考军校。多方考虑之后，我将申请从士兵改成了军官。之后等待我的是三轮紧张的面试。第一关，集体面试：几道简单基础的英语、数学、语文等题目，毫无悬念，基本上大家都会过。接着是医疗体检。志愿是士兵的话，过了第一关和体检之后就直接可以参军了。而我，迎来了第二关：一对一的面试。这一关对于来自大洋彼岸接受过层层面试在这片土地上移民扎根的我来说，并不太难，跨过去，就等于过了军队的第一道门槛。之后呢，由皇家军士学院的代表（在西澳是西澳大学军团），把这些选择去参加军官训练的候选人都集中在一起，进行集体选拔。这第三关，考察的是候选人之间的协同能力，自主能力和创造能力，检验我们是不是符合军队的标准。当然，这三关我都顺利地通过了。经过15个俯卧撑，45个仰卧起坐，1120米的长跑，这最后一道体能测试的小槛我也跨过去了。过五关斩六将，终于，我成为了军校学员。 Read more

My Story ~ 24. The Older I Get, The More I Enjoy My Life

• by: Fan Hong & Liang Fen (Eds.)

“Draw wisdom from the spring of life and you can taste its sweetness.”

I was born in 1957; however, at the age of 40, I split my life in two different hemispheres – China, the northern and Australia, the southern. At my age, I can treat these two different countries in a mature way and not discard either of them. Normally, people at this age are reluctant to leave home for a foreign land, but I did, and after growing older I began to consider the whole world as my home, and the older I get, the more I want to travel. Yes, though old, I am never satisfied. I want new and different experiences.

I was born in a small village in Linjiang, Zhejiang, a place where all villagers possess the same surname. This is quite unique in China which only shows that in the long peaceful life here, from one generation to the next we never left our village. There’s clearly a bond between this piece of land and me, my ancestors, our blood. My name was actually given to me by a female Commission Secretary, it means hardworking and simple, expressing both the reality of material shortage in 1957 and the great ideal of “thrifty for the country and home”. Then I began my schooling days relying on the spirits of endeavor which was quite unique at that time, and I left my village for a big city. What followed was graduation, working, marriage and having children, all stages of life that Chinese people did in those years, unhurried and in an orderly fashion.

I lived in Hangzhou which is one of the ancient capital cities and boasts beautiful scenery and also beautiful legends including the love story of Whitesnake. Also located in the downtown area is a famous lake – West Lake which has stimulated thousands of poems and tears. My wife and I worked in a university at that time and we would go to West Lake in our spare time. Compared with cities of today, Hangzhou at that time was a small city with a population of only several million. Not much industry, no excessive construction, this small city was actually quite clean and beautiful. I still remember that I would ride a bike, with our little daughter in the front and my wife in the back seat, to the Lake during holidays. There would be lots of tourists in fine weather, all contributing to a lively, free and comfortable atmosphere. Yes, this is the main leisure activity in Hangzhou. During those days, I had no idea of what my life would become.

My wife was transferred to Australia in 1995. It was at that time that the idea of immigration came into her mind and she also encouraged me to consider doing the same. However, I rejected the idea. What I was thinking was that I was nearly forty years old and it was really a major decision to fit into a new environment. Actually, the biggest difficulty would be the language. You can’t imagine what it is like to live and communicate with others if you don’t know English. Besides, I lived pretty well in Hangzhou. Going to Australia meant I had to abandon all that I had accumulated after years’ of effort and start all over again, like a young man, which would be a big challenge for me. So what I planned then was to wait for several years after I had retired. Read more

我的故事 ~ 24. 越老越没活够

• by: Fan Hong & Liang Fen (Eds.)

“只要你能低下头，就能尽情畅饮。”

我，1957年生，却以40岁为分界将生命的前后分为横跨不同半球的两截。前半部分在中国，后半部分在澳洲。四十岁才开始的转折如此的平均，使得无法割舍其中的任何一端，四十岁的分割又如此理性，可以用成熟开放的心态来看待这两个不同的国家，四十岁出走的又这样特别，中国人越老越留恋故土，我却越老越把世界当成故乡，还想等再老一点到处走走，越老越看不够！

我出生于浙江临海下面的一个小村庄，整个村子的人同一个姓，包括村名。这样的村庄在中国很常见，这既表明在漫长的平静农村生活中，我们祖先大概有很多年没有离开这片土地了，同时也是我和祖先、土地、血脉至今无法割舍的勾连。我的名字还是当时的一个女区委书记起的，寓意“既勤且俭”，既暗示着57年建国初期物资匮乏的现实，却又激荡着那个时代“勤俭治国、勤俭治家”的伟大理想。就这样上学、上学，依靠着当时并不多的奋进的渠道，我一步步从乡村来到了城市，毕业、工作、结婚、生子，就如当时身边的大多数中国人，不紧不慢、一步一步地走入预定的轨迹。

我当时所在的城市是杭州，这里曾经生活过痴情的白蛇、伟大的文豪、神圣的帝王，在这个城市最中心还有一个可能是中国历史上最有名的湖——西湖，文人墨客的诗句和离人的泪水从没有间断过向湖水中倾注。我和妻子当时在大学工作，空闲时间就在这个美丽的城市中游玩，和今天的城市比起来，当时的杭州还仅仅是一座小城市，仅有几百万人口，也没有太多的工业，也没有到处大兴建设，所以城市很干净、很漂亮，空气也很好。至今最深的记忆就是在假日里我骑着自行车，前面坐着当时还小的女儿，后面坐着妻子，十分钟就骑到了西湖边，在天气好的时候，湖边有着各种各样的游客，热闹、自在、闲散又舒适。这就是当时杭州人的最主要的休闲方式。就在这样自在的生活中，我完全没有意识到生活会在后来大变样。

在1995年的时候，妻子被学校公派到澳大利亚工作，也就在那时，她就有了移民到澳大利亚的打算，她自己在准备的时候，也鼓动我到澳大利亚来，我却立马拒绝了。我想的是，自己年龄也不小了，当时三十好几快四十岁了，完全习惯了当时的生活，还要下这么大决心去一个完全陌生的地方。其实最主要的困难在于我完全不懂英语，无法想象到澳洲怎样生活、怎样和人交流。况且当时在杭州生活条件还不错，如果下定决心到澳大利亚，就要抛弃自己努力多年的成果，和年轻时一样从头打拼，这让我很难接受，所以当时的打算是，再在中国工作几年，等到退休时来澳大利亚就不用这样犹豫和牵挂了。 Read more

My Story ~ 25. Half Australian And Half Chinese

• by: Fan Hong & Liang Fen (Eds.)

“It’s an advantage to have both quality and education of the East combined with an education and background of the West.”

I came to Australia in August, 2003.

I choose to study abroad after graduation from high school like many people who were born after 1980. Though I could enter a second-level college with my college entrance examination score, I made the conclusion that there would be no ideal work for me in China.

My presents chose Western Australia because a friend of my father worked there and thus could take care of me. I still remember clearly how depressed I was feeling when I left home. I’m the only son in my family and had never left my parents. After my 17^th birthday, I came to this foreign land 10 thousand miles away from home. It was the first time for me to have this lonely feeling with no one to turn to. Though there was a friend of my father’s, I had no sense of home.

At first, my school was in Fremantle and I studied preparatory courses there, while my home was in the northern part of Perth, which meant I had to transfer two buses, two trains and then walk to school. I had a hard life, but on the other hand, I made many friends, some on the train and others from school. Actually it’s quite easy to make friends here and compared with other students of the same age in 2+2 class, my greatest advantage was that I knew a lot about Australian communication and working methods because of my year’s study. I had more friends, not only had a good relationship with Chinese and Asian people but also the Australian world. They became my study and life companions and I did not feel unfamiliar after entering the college, the feeling totally disappeared.

I entered college one year later. Quite unexpectedly, another problem emerged: the major of computer science was too boring for me to go on with.

After discussing this problem with my parents, I transferred to commerce; accounting and finance which finally made me feel at ease. With more spare time, I found a part-time job just like other students. I like to try different things and I’ve been a waiter and a dishwasher; I repaired computers, prepared accounts, delivered newspapers, conducted surveys and sold things; later I did business accounts and financial accounting. I gained a lot during this time, not only extra money but a sense of independence and cherishment and appreciation, as well as my value to society and how to become part of society. I always made friends with my workmates after several weeks. We were responsible and we communicated a lot during rest breaks. We hung out together and had fun. Well, the only thing that made me sad was on my birthday. I worked late, until 11 o’clock in the evening and it was a Saturday. I got on the bus and found I was the only passenger. I called my mom and she started to wish me a happy birthday and asked me what I was doing, whether I was celebrating with friends? I said no and told her that I had just finished work and was sitting on a bus going home. It was really hard but you should take the responsibility as long as you are in charge. People here actually pay more attention to punctuality and responsibility. And of course I’ve learnt a lot during this process.  Read more